There are a number of different reasons why relationships fail, the one this article addresses is excessive intimacy claims.  Now this is pretty fancy terminology for saying basically one person wants another person in the relationship to be exactly as empathetic or sympathetic to their needs, wants and desires as they want them to be, and sadly their partner isn’t always going to have the right amounts of these specific things.

Often times a person is able to be empathetic, and walk in your partner’s shoes in certain situations, but when your partner expects you to be empathetic one hundred percent of the time it would be hard for anyone to be able to do it.  These problems also have a lot to do with a certain partner expecting their partner to have the same emotions towards various people in their lives.  Like if I were to hate my boss, I would expect my partner to hate my boss too but this sadly sometimes just isn’t the case.  This type of thinking often creates problems in relationships, because each of you want your partner to want what you want or the other way around, and you always want to be sympathized with.  What stems from this line of selfish emotional thinking is a restricting of freedom for both partners.  All of a sudden you find yourself not being able to like who you want to like anymore, or you aren’t allowed to be friends with who you want to be friends with, and eventually you start losing your own identity.

So although intimacy is what every relationship strives for excessive intimacy can be a reason why relationships fail. Although you may want your spouse to feel the same way about certain things as you do, never expect them to feel the same way about everything, and don’t be hurt or offended when they do feel differently about things.


Filed under: Relationship Advice

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