Relationship Control: Who’s Wearing the Pants in Your Relationship?

Young Couple in Relationship Conflict

Young Couple in Relationship Conflict— (

Whether you are already married or still in the boyfriend and girlfriend stage, there is one person who is wearing the pants in the relationship.  The question is, who is it?  Traditionally, before jeans became the common fashion and even women started wearing them, men wore pants and the women wore skirts.  In a relationship, it translates as the man being the one to be the prime mover in terms of relationship control.  Now do not get me wrong, that does not mean that the ladies should simply fall prey to his every whim.  Women after all are empowered beings and in this day and age, it is a proven fact that women are very much capable of being in control.


But here is the hard truth that men have to realize and women have to admit – every woman wants to be treated like the princess that she is.  Although she is strong, smart, strong-willed and very much capable of calling the shots, at the end of the day, she wants a man who she can rely on.  How many women reading this can truthfully and honestly say that they want to be the one who is wearing the pants in the relationship?  If a woman dares to be honest, then should admit to wanting to have a reliable male partner to do the relationship control and the responsibilities that fall under it.

Take this classic example into consideration.  A study was conducted among families – one with the man doing the relationship control and the other is a batch of women who are acting as the head of the family.  One thing stands in common – whoever is the main breadwinner has the relationship control.  So if the guy is earning more, he is automatically the head of the household. The same goes if the situation was reversed.  There are exceptions to the rules of course but generally, that statement stands.  Now consider this, even though women do not mind earning for the family, most of them do not want to be the main breadwinner.  Sure helping out financially is great but since women are designed to take care of the home and the kids, it is the task of the husband to provide for his family.  If the situation were reversed, there is a great chance for the wife to eventually have feelings of resentment for her husband for his inability to be the main earner for the home.

So for the “balance of power” to work in a relationship, it is still best for men to be the ones to wear the pants although, they must always consider their wife or girlfriend when making decisions because there can be no better advisers than their partners.  Men long for respect.  If they can provide for the family, the woman would consequently give them that which they need most.  Women long for love.  If they feel secure that the man is providing, then they are able to receive what they need most too.