Here are some basic ways to improve your relationship.  You should start by looking for some basic things like noticing if you and your partner are stuck in a specific routine, is there one person who always makes the choices about where you are going to go, or what you are going to do?  A very easy thing to do to improve your relationship is just reverse those things.  The person who doesn’t usually make the choices has to choose for the next week.  Starting by noticing these routinized portions of the relationship and really mixing them up will add new life to your relationship.

Another thing you can do to improve your relationship is really notice them, and stop taking them for granted.  If you notice how they are always there when you get home, always cook you a meal, or even feed the dogs, really try to notice these small details and express your gratitude and appreciation for them.  Really to change a relationship for the better you have to really focus on yourself, accept that you have very little control over them and it is near impossible to change them.  You have the most changing power in a relationship over yourself.  If you change the way you act, it will force your partner to change the way they act.  Finally it is extremely important to set goals for your relationship.  Imagine what your perfect relationship would be, then set goals that will help you get your relationship there.  Write out a ten year plan for your relationship, or write out some short term goals you want to accomplish.   Then start writing ways in which you can actually reach those goals.

There are a few ways you can take a stale relationship and give it a breath of fresh air.  Notice if you are stuck in a rutt and get out of it, appreciate what your partner does, make yourself a better partner, and set goals that will improve your relationship.



Filed under: Control In a Relationship

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